Monday Musings

     Happy Monday ya'll! Don't worry, I won't bore you with a million motivational quotes or stories (those are saved for my Facebook Group).  But I have been stuck in my head this weekend and wanted to spend some time getting it all down on (virtual) paper.

     Mostly my thoughts keep coming back to relationships and boundaries.  Where do you draw that line? And who do you know what lines to draw? Being a closed off castle with high walls, a mot, a gator to protect yourself isn't the most fulfilling lifestyle. I wouldn't say I'm a super social person by any means.  I love to stay in alone or with my husband and cats and just mind my own business.  I love reading books and wondering about the library and prefer working out solo.

Me, all by myself and unbothered. 

     But relationships are so important to me.  Even if they don't look exactly like what people think when they say "I LOVE MY FRIENDS".  No, I will not be hugging you goodbye.  And no, I will not be dying to come over every day of the week.  But that doesn't mean my relationships are any less valid.  I love spending time with my friends, they are honestly my chosen family.

     In fact, I probably have one of the closest groups of friends I've ever had in my entire life.  We are in constant contact.  And if you saw my last post, you can clearly see they are always there for me with flowers or cards or even job offers.  I am a ridiculous amount of lucky to have these people.  People I know I can trust and people that don't gossip or share mean stories behind my back.  Because even as we entire our 30's I still see that happening on the regular.

     But that doesn't mean I still don't need boundaries in check.  I've learned that if I give too much I will develop expectations, which are unfair to me and the person.  That I need to find that comfortable level of taking care of Sam better than anyone before I can really care for others around me.  It's also been about taking that step back and really evaluating who cares. Who notices when you are in a slump? Who is worried about your well being and state of mind? Who is going through a hard time themselves but still wants you to take care of you?

     Sometimes this means you make some really hard decisions and learn to really put people at a distance.  Sometimes it means you are pleasantly surprised and find out there are way more people there for you then you thought. It's learning that others have a different love language than you.  I don't really care for gifts or physical affection.  But someone wants to help a girl out and run an errand when I'm swamped or tell me how much I mean to them I swoon. But I do my best to really ensure I understand others love languages and give back where I can (but not physically... don't touch me).

     So here is to navigating relationships with friends, family, and lovers.  Cause that shit is hard.